Tuesday, March 25, 2014

IT'S THE ONE-HUNDREDTH STEVE'S BLOG! YAY!

OK,OK,calm down,Steve, I  hear you say. You've reached Number 100. (Technically, Volume 2,Number 14, or 2.14  if you've been keeping score.) But that's no reason  to go all Kermit The Frog on us!

As the proprietor of Ye Olde Blog, I doth feel compelled to say thee nay. Just think of it. Ten months, nearly twenty countries, and I couldn't have done it without you guys, so stand up and take a bow. (Actually, I COULD  have done it without you, but it would have been BORRRRRINNNNG!) And I also  have good reason to channel old Googly-Eyes:

MUPPETS MOST WANTED (G) Starring Muppet Characters Created by Jim Henson, Frank Oz and Jerry Nelson, and Ricky Gervais, Tina Fey, and Ty Burrell and Featuring Christophe Beck, Salma Hayek,
Celine Dion, Usher Raymond, Sean "P. Diddy" Combs,Jemaine Clement,Tom Hiddleston, WWE Superstar Hornswoggle, and Josh  Groban A Mandeville Films Production Distributed by Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures

As Dr. Benson  Honeydew, the inventor and brains  of the Muppet gang reminds  us in the opening number, this is actually the seventh sequel to THE MUPPET MOVIE,but I doubt if the late,great Jim Henson  (recently joined in Heaven by his widow Jane and  long-time partner Jerry Nelson) could have imagined the impact 2012's THE MUPPETS had on the franchise. Literally picking up where the last movie left off,Kermie,Fozzie, and the ever-divine Miss Piggy contemplate something that will rival anything they ever have done together. Just then, fate steps in in the form of the creator of this little show called "The Office," I refer, of course to Ricky Gervais.  In  this movie, he plays talent agent Dominic Badguy (pronounced "Bad-gee,"  with a hard G sound), who helps  Kermit set up The Muppet Show World  Tour. Unbeknownst to our heroes, Konstantin, the world's most dangerous frog, is on the loose,  and he AND DOMINIC are out to sabotage the Muppets' world tour and steal the art treasures of Europe. As the real Kermit winds up in the Gulag and tries to escape smitten prison guard Nadia (played to comic perfection by Tina Fey), his  evil twin tries his dangdest to host a good old-fashioned Muppet Show in the great theatres of Berlin, Madrid,Dublin and London, joined by a "Who's Who" of superstars. although the best guest star performance clearly belongs to Celine Dion. (Another scene-stealer is  Ty Burrell,  playing a bumbling Interpol agent clearly inspired by the great Peter Sellers.) Long story short: If you haven't seen this most sensational, inspirational, celebrational, Muppetational movie yet, HOP TO IT!

I  hate to spoil this  party, but some people think I  should edit this blog.

Suppose Walt Disney made "Snow  White and the One Dwarf!"

Suppose Thomas  Jefferson wrote, "We want our own country, the King is a dork,we're all in this together,  we're going to light fireworks and eat hot dogs at baseball games!"

Suppose "Romeo and Juliet" was exactly the same as that Nextel commercial!

Suppose Beethoven only wrote one symphony!

Suppose The Beatles flew right back to Liverpool after that Ed Sullivan guest shot and all  became lawyers!

The fact of the matter is, if I edit this blog, I sacrifice a lot of what makes it the masterpiece people are talking about from London, England to London, Ontario.Say what you will about America, the best thing we've got is  our freedom, and that freedom, along with the creative spark that drove Disney,Jefferson,Shakespeare,  Beethoven and John, Paul, George and Ringo, is the engine that drives this blog. Now, don't get me wrong, some of my best friends are editors, but I will never forgive or forget the two most heartless cold-blooded killers in the history of literature: Jim Shooter of Marvel, who rubbed out Jean Grey, the first female member of the Uncanny X-Men, and DC's Mike Carlin, who committed the ultimate atrocity by destroying the inspiration for many of the First Responders  who looked into, and laughed into the face of  evil  on that terrible day in September, I refer, of course, to  SUPERMAN.

What say you all?  Should I edit this blog  (SOB!) or leave it the way it is? (Please-say-leave-it-the-way-it-is,please-say-leave-it-the-way-it-is!)

All righty then, I just want to wrap it up by thanking everybody out  there in Readerland, especially Nicole, Gretchen, Genesis and Chelsea at Madison Square Garden, Judy Rooks Wilder, and my best friend and toughest critic, Bettijane L. Eisenpreis, for their support over these past one hundred blogs, and THE BEST IS YET TO COME!

Bye, Buckaroos!
Steve

P.S.: Welcome aboard, Sweden, home of the SAAB,ABBA,the team behind all those Backstreet Boys, Britney Spears,Robyn Katy Perry,and *NSYNC hits, Ingmar Bergman, Henrik Lundquist,"The Girl With the Dragon Tatoo," and VIRDIVIRDIVIDI! (Apologies for that lame Swedish Chef impression!)

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