Sunday, June 16, 2013

Monkeying Around

Good morning, afternoon, and evening, dudes and dudettes, (or "dudesses", if you prefer) and welcome to another incredible edition of Steve's Blog.

As  you know, I  will be headed out to the Hershey-Harrisburg area of Pennsylvania on July 1st, and not only is Hershey famous for the chocolate bar invented by its namesake and founder Milton S. Hershey, (Somebody suggested he name the town St. Milton's.) but it's also famous for Hersheypark, "The Sweetest Place On Earth." Hersheypark was established by M.S. in 1905 as a place of relaxation for his employees, but as time went on, it became a major tourist destination adding the most famous rides  in amusement industry history,  and, bowing to pressure from Walt Disney World, (and, no doubt, anticipating what would become Six Flags Great Adventure) underwent a major renovation, which included walkabout characters (or   HERSHEY(R) Product Characters, as they're officially known) modeled after Hershey's most famous chocolate brands.

When overanxious guests at WDW ask why their favorite characters talk in mime, their handlers explain that they only talk in the movies. (Except, of course, for Princesses and other human characters.) The only known 
talking chocolate characters work for another company which was founded by former Hershey employee Bill Murrie and entrepeneur Forrest Mars, (Nuff said!) but that doesn't stop the Hershey characters from talking in their own special mime language.

If I may move from the sublime to the totally ridonkulous, today I went to the Empire State Building, which is celebrating its  82nd anniversary, and  80 of those years ago, filmmaker Merian C. Cooper created the saga of "King Kong," the legendary gorilla who met his end in a battle atop that legendary building. Anyone who saw that movie, or its many remakes, knows KK wasn't exactly the verbose type, communicating mostly in growls. (Remember, this was 1933, 35 years before the original Doctor Dolittle movie hit theatres,  so, there wasn't a great need for humans  fluent in Animalese.)

I read another blog criticizing the ESB for failing to acknowledge the Kongster's illustrious debut, so, imagine my surprise when I make it to the building museum,  and whaddayaknow, there's Jungle Boy, or rather, his walkabout  character, palling around with the guests, and,  as I hear Mr. Cooper and Fay Wray do a combined 720 in their respective graves, TALKING WITH A HUMAN VOICE IN ENGLISH!I know many of the rights to King Kong have reverted to the public domain, but, ESB management, C'MON! You should have had your guy mime King Kong and either attempt a simianesque growl or attach a mike with a pre-recorded growl the way Peter Mayhew, the first actor to play Chewbacca, has to make the comic con portrayer of his furry alter ego sound more convincing. What you geniuses, and I use the term VERY loosely, have done is tantamount to dressing up a guy as Elmo and having him scream at an innocent family because they didn't tip him for posing in a picture! (I know, that REALLY happened, but I'm just making a point, and don't say the only point is on the top of my head. OK, you CAN  say it, because, as I keep saying, I DO welcome your comments, which reminds me, the only comments I've been getting have been in emails, other than the nice comment WAAAAAAAAAY back in SB3. That comment box at the end of the blog exists for a reason, peeps!)

BTW, Kongratulations to Kim Kardashian and Kanye West on kreating a kute kid. Unfortunately, Kween  Kong is out of the kwestion is a  name, so, as a tribute to the late great komik kreator George Karlin, you guys name her Kongolia? (Remember Congolea Breckinridge, George's advice collumnist?)

Thanks for reading the Going Bananas portion of Steve's Blog starring Steve ("Where is Sam Hennessey when you need him?") Eisenpreis. Portions of the preceding show were last seen heading over to Tokyo to talk the producers of the Godzilla remake out of a similar dumb stunt. On behalf of the management and staff, this is your announcer reminding you, you don't have to be a wild and crazy guy to write a blog, but, hey, it doesn't hurt!

Bye, Buckaroos!


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